Friday, November 19, 2004

Doc Doc, whos there?

So I went to a doctor.. im not one of those fancy pants that has a doctor that knows my name.. I guess my doctor visits are too full of shame for me wanting to know the guy... I just pick a urgent care place and go...in and out.. here's whats wrong, give me the prescription or the comb to kill the bug and let me be on my way.

Todays doctor was a Indian.. not a guy from India, but a real Indian.. the kind that like coyotes and camping. His breath smelled like a expired mouse trap. I briefly told him what I was doing and he just stared at me... Not saying a word.. no emotion on his face.. not even a quiet..."juicy fruit".... nadda...

I told him about the poop, sneezes, the bloody noses, the recent itching... and the Pepsi Spice Project.. He went off on food poisons, infections.. he told me to drink water.. I told him I couldn't... he just stared at me again.

He told me that was my choice.

He gave me 3 tubes, and told me to poop in them and come back the next day so they can test me for infections and worms.. He told me I shouldn't gamble with my health... I snickered because he said "gambled"...greedy Indian.

Im too tired to explain the horror of pooping in those three tubes.. I will write it in the morning...

STATS

Pepsi holiday Spice Consumed:
24 (12oz cans)
1.5 (2 liters)

Health Effects Noted (If Any): Sneezing, extreme itching on neck area..looks like dry skin.